Thursday, November 17, 2011

What you See



What you see


I'm tired. I lack the desire to do what I need to do.My kids have had PB&J for lunch every day for a month. Except the times I bother to go out and get pizza. My Facebook status are mingled with cries of frustration. It is so clearly written on my face that words of encouragement come to me in emails, messages and phone calls. And their advice rings true, stay consistent, be strong, this will pass. Logically, I know that. But after weeks of not sleeping properly, my son's sudden strong will, my oldest daughters hormonal outbursts and just life in general, I struggle. I even might have threatened to send all the kids to public school at one point this past month.

What I really feel like at this moment
I don't write this for sympathy (though I certainly appreciate it!) but rather to remind my readers that this is real. We are a real family with real struggles. Homeschooling hasn't been a magical cure all. We are still living in the same world you are. This isn't always the way it is, but right now I truly can not see past the end of this "season".

Blogging gives a snap shot. But only as much or as little as the writer wants to share. Often we share the best, giving the impression of perfection that simply isn't true. It isn't meant to be a blatant deception, but rather the "put on a joyful front" that not only represents the homeschooler but often the Christian in general. Being anything but joyful will damage your witness! I disagree. What better time for Christ to show His grace and glory than when we are struggling! What better time for us to lean on his sufficiency and to show the world that Christ is enough!

So I sit here, praying and crying. Wondering when things will be back to normal. And then I rest and remember that peace will come in God's time.

2 Corinthians 12:9
And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.




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26 comments:

Anonymous said...

Anna, I appreciate your being real with your readers. And know this, you aren't a bad mom, your kids are fine, and you will come through this. :) Hang in there.
~Christa

hillbillywoman said...

Been there!

Heather said...

Anna,
The Lord loves your transperant heart! Even as I was reading this, which was many days later, I could see you sitting in his lap and His strength infusing into you! Blessings fellow homeschool mom, I am praying for supernatural strength for every season, but these seasons specifically!!
Heather

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