Friday, June 8, 2012

ADHD and Daughters and Moms and Mouthiness

Today I had a conversation that went something like this:
Me (on phone with my children's father otherwise known as my husband):  "Well, honey, it is only 7:49."
Daughter who recently decided she knows everything:  "Actually, it is 7:50."
Me (pointing to the microwave clock that - thank the Good Lord - clearly read 7:49): "Seriously?"

I follow my daughter's eyes down as they look at the clock on the stove - it says 7:50.  "Oh," She says.

Oh indeed.

Unfortunately, I just thought YES!!!  WOO HOO!!!  I WIN!!!  I know that doesn't speak much about my character as of late, but it is the honest truth.  I am just being real when I say that it felt like I had won the "who was right about the time" lottery.  I was happy dancing in my head.

As I was thinking about this on and off today.  She frequently tries to correct me, admonish me, show me how right she is and how wrong she thinks I am. She wants to be held in high esteem for her wealth of knowledge and wisdom and instead ends up showing off how young and foolish she is.

I want her to recognize that I am "36 freaking years old" and am not an idiot, contrary to what she seems to believe.

I know three things:

It is a power struggle of epic proportions.
It has to end.
Parenting is hard, Y'all.

I read something really, really good and wanted to share it with you.  An article written in ADDittude Magazine.  It had a list of 12 facts and suggestions for parenting a girl with ADHD.  I found several really good reminders here!  Namely, to not to take ADHD symptoms and assign them as personality traits or attribute them to rebelliousness. They go on to remind us that frequently forgetting things is not passive aggressive behavior.  I *needed* to be reminded of that.  :)  Go forth! Read the article.

I am going to avoid the battle. I am going to stop talking when I want to say everything. I am going to remind myself that if what I am doing or saying doesn't feel like love or can not be justified in love, that it is probably not. I am going to try not to be so dang mouthy!

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1 comment:

Genevieve V. said...

Hi there. Just found your blog. Encouraging post. I like the humor in it as well. :o) Don't know if you have a Brain Balance Achievement Center near by, but they have had amazing results with many of the neurobehavioral disorders. You can also check out the Disconnected Kid by Dr. Melillo (co-founder). Just thought I'd pass it along.