If It Ain't Broke: Knowing When and If You Should Change Curriculum

When we first started homeschooling 3 years ago I knew exactly what curriculum I wanted to use. I grew up on Abeka and I figured that since I knew the curriculum and it was a "boxed" curriculum, I figured it would be a cinch for me to teach my own children. What I wasn't prepared for was for it not to work. In the beginning I thought it was me. I wasn't doing enough of the script or we weren't reviewing enough. I found myself supplementing and eventually I couldn't even bring myself to open the books. Once I spoke to more seasoned homeschoolers I found myself browsing the curriculum section at Mardel and eventually settled on Explode the Code which I swear is the reason my children know how to read. That is not to say that Abeka isn't a good curriculum, but it simply wasn't working for us.

Exploring Mardel was an eye opening experience but what really opened my world up was visiting the local once a year Homeschool Book Fair. Never had I been surrounded by so many wonderful curriculum options! Each vendor knew exactly what to say to get you to pull out your wallet. I picked up a book here and a few there and dropped a few hundred that day. Thankfully, most of that worked.

Navigating curriculum choices can be overwhelming. Whether you are a new homeschooler or a few years in like we are, the allure of all the pretty books is sometimes more than one can bear! The trick to keeping your curriculum purchases in check is to be sure you know when it is really time to change.

The best advice I have gotten regarding curriculum is "the best curriculum is the curriculum that is getting done". So the first question to ask yourself is just that. Are you getting it done or is that book being shoved aside or being consistently put off until you forget you have it? If you find yourself constantly avoiding a piece of curriculum it is time to move on.

You are pushing through that curriculum that you really don't like, but you paid for it and gee-whiz it is going to be done! Right after you and your child quit crying. Some of us have the ability to force ourselves through a book. On one hand it is a great learning experience about perseverance. On the other it is a good way to find yourself overwhelmed and ready to give up all together. If you or your child dislike, truly dislike, a curriculum so much that you have an emotional response to it, it is time to move on.

In the early days of our homeschooling adventure I had no idea what my children's learning styles or what my own homeschool philosophy was. I would literally walk in to a store and say "oh that looks good" and buy it. Let's just say this didn't really work out. Take a moment to think about what you're trying to accomplish and how your child best learns. If your curriculum doesn't line up, it is time to move on.

The quickest way to burn out is let yourself get bored or overwhelmed with your curriculum, but the quickest way to go broke is to flip-flop around with it. Be sure that each time you are considering a change that you prayerfully consider changes in your child's curriculum. Just as there are times to move on, there are also times to push through it!

New Year Changes: Update on Our Schooling

We are finally there. The plan is to start moving in sometime towards the end of the week! While we have been living with my parents our schooling has changed quite a bit. Add that in to having a house to take care of and animals to come shortly and it has meant our schedule will be changing quite a bit too. We have also made big changes to our curriculum and schooling methods.



 Brianna, has been struggling to retain math facts. I started her 3rd grade math over, ditching Teaching Textbooks as I noticed she was having a hard time transferring skills from the computer onto paper. My initial thought was that she needed more of a hands on type of curriculum but I really think now that it is a learning difference. She is very easily overwhelmed by audio instruction and TT and even my very hands on teaching approach was frustrating her and in turn me. She has similar problems with grammar. Last week, after considering many options, including sending her to a 2 day a week university model school, I decided to just take a step back and allow her to learn as independently as possible. Obviously, she can still ask for help any time she needs it, but for the most part this has been working really well. She asks for help, I give her a small instructional session and then she moves on. No flitting from topic to topic as the teacher review had me do. I found through the last chapter she stopped asking for help about 2 lessons in and was doing fantastic work! The week prior to this she would forget what we talked about within minutes of reviewing it. She is still having some trouble with her grammar, but I will just continue to have her practice it until she gets it. Since Keira learns so easily she is also doing this.

We added Institute for Excellence in Writing to our curriculum. I am loving it so far. We did do the student book for a few weeks, but I find myself lamenting spending that money and wish I would have just gone with the teacher set. Once we get settled into our new house and routine we will be ditching the student portion and using our own paragraphs. I will definitely continue using the teacher portion though.

We are ditching formal science and history for the time being. Considering Brianna's difficulties in math and grammar, I want some time to grow her skills in the basics. We will use a living book approach to the both subjects and I am planning on purchasing the Apologia notebooks and having the girls fill them in with not only the Apologia books, but also other library books and online resources. Historical fiction found mostly through Sonlight will also be added to our reading lists.

Keira is now on the gymnastics team. This has been an adjustment for sure. For right now we are at the gym three hours a week, but realize that as she progresses this will increase. Brianna is taking art. Thankfully, within a few weeks this will be happening on the same night as Keira's gym and I will be able to drop her off at a dear friend's house while I take Keira to the gym. Soccer season also starts back up soon. I made Keira choose between gym and soccer and she chose gym, but Brianna will be playing so that is another practice to add in. Luke's indoor season just finished and we decided to give him another year or so before committing to an outdoor season. So just in case you didn't get all of that, we are at the gym 2 times per week, art 1 time per week and soccer is at the least 1 practice per week with anywhere from 1 to 3 games per week. It looks like quite a bit, and is, but when you consider that there are three children with 3 different interests, it is really unavoidable and as long as I can manage it I will do everything I can to support their interests.

As much as I appreciate my parents willingness to let us live in their house, take up their space and eat their food, I am ready to have my own space again. I am looking forward to getting us back onto a strict real food diet and dare I say, I am looking forward to having a house to maintain!

Learning That Not Everyone Wants to be Your Friend: Dealing with Conflict

picture credit

Ahhh, the world of little girls...where they all play princess, dance around delicately and only say sweet things. And then they turn 7 and 8 and 9... Yeah, you only thought that you wouldn't have to deal with girl drama until they were teens.

For anyone that thinks homeschoolers don't have to learn to deal with conflict let me enlighten you. We do. Tonight at gymnastics we had a mandatory meeting for the parents and the kids were left to play in the "lobby" (which is open to the floor). For the most part they were all exceptionally well behaved! I was quite impressed. It seems however, as it happens, I missed some conflict that was happening. My youngest tells me that one of the girls spent a lot of time calling people "butt head" and being generally rude to her. We have had minor issues like that before so I have already started coming up with a strategy on how to deal with it, but my daughter is extremely tender hearted and as per usual, her initial response was to burst into tears because she couldn't understand why the girl did not want to be her friend. So how do we deal with this?

1. I validate my child's feelings. I let her know that she is right to be upset and that the things that were said were hurtful and mean. I want her to understand that as small as it seems to me, I know that it is big for her. I also want her to know that she can come to me and be taken seriously.

2. We evaluate whether she could have misunderstood. Sometimes kids get going in their games and get excited and lose control. It happens. In boys we see them start off playing with their action figures, suddenly the action figures are fighting with each other and the next thing you know the boys are rough housing and someone gets hurt. No one really meant to be ugly, but children aren't known for practicing self-control and they definitely don't always think through the consequences of their actions.

3. I  give her an appropriate response. Our "canned" response is to look at the person being ugly and say firmly, "I want to be your friend but you may not treat me ugly. If you are going to be mean I will go get my mother/father/whoever is in charge. Can we play together nicely and be friends?" If they say no, they are to say okay and walk away. If the meanness continues they then are to immediately come get me. What I want to do is teach them to have grace and forgiveness, but that they do not have to be someone's doormat.

4. Let them know that it is okay if they aren't friends with everyone, but that they must extend Godly love no matter what.

5. If it escalates to the point of needing to talk to the other child's parent, I always go there without her first. We all do it, we find out our child might be misbehaving and we get a little defensive when it is addressed. I want to make sure that my daughter is not subjected to grown up bullies just as much as I want to shield her from the child ones.

6. Hitting, kicking, biting, throwing things, etc are NEVER acceptable and they are to come get me at once!

7. Model the appropriate response to conflict. Nothing teaches a child better, how to handle conflicting personalities than to see their parent handle it gracefully.


We are never going to be friends with everyone, but we can show our children that we can still be Godly and loving even to people who are mean to us.

It Isn't About Where We School

By now we have all heard of the Connecticut school tragedy which took 26 lives, including 20 children ages 6 and 7. Any normal mother is grieving and suddenly over aware of where her children are and wondering if they are safe. The day it happened I could not even bring myself to bother with school. We literally sat on my bed watching movies all day. All I could do was be near my babies. I wanted to jump on top of them and shield them even there, in the safety of my bedroom, in the safety of my locked house, in the safety of the country where "things like that never happen". I won't let it.

Isn't that what we always say? That can't happen here. It won't. We don't live in an area where murders live. I homeschool. I keep my kids with me nearly every moment of every day. When they are with me, they are safe.It can't happen. I won't let it.

At first it was about gun control. That argument even made me angry. Control the guns and you control the criminals. Now it is about where we send our children to school. If those parents were only homeschooling! If they only knew how much safer we are here, at home, tucked into my bed, watching family movies together. Nothing like that happens here! I won't let it.

You all know that I am a supporter of homeschooling. I think it is the best way to educate. I do. I do not however, think that now is the time to be shoving the fact that our children were not the victims in the faces of those whose children were! As I write this my two oldest are sitting in a crowded restaurant, with few exits and little hope of escaping someone determined to kill. Thursday we were in a gym where 20 little girls lined up practicing cartwheels with no closets to run to should someone come in determined to kill. The location of where these children were is IRRELEVANT in the grand scheme of the evil that happened. Evil knows no boundaries. It doesn't care whether your child is homeschooled, or public schooled. It doesn't care if your child is 7 or if they are a young college student. Tragedy happens EVERYWHERE. The first victim was the killers own mother, in her own home.

The location was tragic. The fact that it was mostly children was tragic. The thought that you can't go to school, or to church, or out to eat without at least putting yourself out there for something tragic to happen is sometimes unbearable, especially after events like this. But now, my homeschooling friends, is not the time to preach homeschooling. Now is not the time to forget that even if we don't agree on educational philosophy, that these parents sent their precious little ones to a place where they should have been safe, where things like this shouldn't happen. Instead of taking this and using it as a homeschooling platform, I beg of you to do nothing but cry with these parents, pray for all of those involved, and remember that we are only protected by the grace and mercy of God and at any point, he may also allow our little ones to be taken, maybe even violently, and nothing, not even homeschooling, can prevent that.

Charlotte Bacon, 6
Daniel Barden, 7
Rachel Davino, 29
Olivia Engel, 6
Josephine Gay, 7
Ana Marquez-Greene, 6

Dylan Hockley, 6
Dawn Hochsprung, 47
Madeleine Hsu, 6
Catherine Hubbard, 6
Chase Kowalski, 7
Jesse Lewis, 6
James Mattioli, 6
Grace McDonnell, 7
Anne Marie Murphy, 52
Emilie Parker, 6
Jack Pinto, 6
Noah Pozner, 6
Caroline Previdi, 6
Jessica Rekos, 6
Avielle Richman, 6
Lauren Rousseau, 30
Mary Sherlach, 56
Victoria Soto,27
Benjamin Wheeler, 6
Allison Wyatt, 6

Homeschool Mom Sends Kid to Public School - a Possible Disaster in the Making

Yesterday was my seven year old son's first day of school.  We had been preparing for days.  The school uniform had been bought and tailored to fit (I was hemming them an hour before we were scheduled to leave the house) and inspected (we picked all the little white puppy dog hairs off the black shirt) and located a couple pencils and a backpack that had a working zipper.  I located three *important* pieces of mail to prove my address (my mortgage statement, utility bill, and a piece of unopened junk mail from Discover card that I thought could pass for a bill). He had to have a school physical first, so we went to the doctors office and got the necessary paperwork.

We made the decision to send Micah to school for a number of reasons, not because he was not learning at home or was being difficult, but because we need the resources the system offers in a way that we would not get without him being enrolled.  The doctor said that the was "very interested to see what happens."  Hopefully, this will help us in our journey to help Micah get a good diagnosis or help confirm the one he now has. Micah was super excited and honestly, so was my husband.  I think he was glad I was doing something "normal" for once......

Anyway, back to the first day of school. I had my 2 youngest daughters with me so the 4 of us went into the school building.  The girls were pretty thrilled to see the inside of the school.  Quin, my 7 year old, asked if she could go.  She said lunch smelled good.  We gave all the appropriate paperwork to the office staff and were walked down the hall to meet the teacher and the class.  The teacher invited us into the room, introduced Micah, got him situated at a desk and then the trouble came.

Teacher to me: "Did you bring any supplies."
Me: Blink. Blink. "Uhm. Well, we found a pencil this morning, I uh, guess we left it at home."
Teacher to the moron mom (me): "Oh, well, I will loan him some of mine, but he will need supplies."
Me: "Of course! So, uh do you have a list or something?" (I can feel the 6 and 7 year old students judging me.
Teacher: "Yes, this is a list" (hands me a  list).
Me, seeing it is mostly normal stuff, rambled:  "Oh! Good, we have a lot of this stuff at home because you know we homeschooled and we have supplies - most of the supplies on the list as a matter of fact - and I just did not think about sending this stuff, but we homeschooled so we have like, scissors and glue and stuff and you know, supplies."
I try to offer one of my smiles that others have claimed to be "beautiful"  and "lights up a room" - and stuff....

Teacher, looks at me, unimpressed and makes a sound that sounded like she choked a bit. Probably biting her tongue to keep from saying what she really feels - That I am acting like an idiot who has no sense of the real world and probably need some socialization.
Me: "So er, what is the difference between a word tablet and a writing tablet?"
Teacher tries to explain it to me but I start looking at all the kids looking at me and seeing my little baby boy sitting at a *school* desk with is big beautiful brown eyes and I feel the tears start to well up as I start thinking about how I am going to have to leave him there all alone in this cold, concrete building.
Me, trying desperately to pay attention, and to regain some of my composure:  "So, does the tablet actually say "Word Tablet"?"
Teacher, sighing: "As I was explaining, you will just give us the money for the supplies and we will get those for him from the supply room."
Me: "Oh. Okay, then.  Do you guys take a check?"
Teacher: "Yes, just write it out to Pope Elementary."
Me, rummaging for the checkbook in my purse:  "Oh okay. I can do that right now."
Teacher: "Well just send it with him tomorrow, you interrupted my lesson."
She then goes on to tell me that I need to send field trip money and homemade cookies as well.  partners (people who .
Me: "Oh uh sorry, yeah, I will send it back to you and the money for the field trip and I will send the cookies on Wednesday.  Got it."
The teacher starts escorting us out.  I stop and tell Micah to have a good day and that I love him and we walk out of the classroom, the teacher shutting the door behind us.
I start feeling my eyes get all watery and my face is hot.  I start sniffing.
Then I hear:
"Mrs. Carter!"
I turn to see the teacher walking very quickly to us.  I match her pace, because darn it, she needs me for something and I have a purpose and I am not an imbecile!
We meet up about halfway.
Teacher:  "What about lunch?"
Me: "Lunch?" Blink. Blink.
Teacher: "Yes, his lunch money."
Me: "Oooohhh his lunch money."
Teacher, sighing: "Yes, he needs $1.70 cents. Just give me $2.00 and I will have him bring back change."
Me, opening purse and beginning to rummage: "Oh yes, I have that.  But my change purse is empty and so it is in here in the bottom of my bag, but I have that..." I begin showing her hand fulls of change.
She looks at me: "Don't worry about it. I need to get back to my lesson.  Just send it with him tomorrow."
Me: "Oh.Well okay but I have it, I have right here in my purse."
Teacher: "That is alright, I will just get it from him tomorrow."

She turns around and goes back to her classroom.
I walk to the van and get the girls situated.
Then I went to Panera and had an early lunch. Then I went shopping at Lane Bryant.
I am sure all those people thought I was an idiot too, you know, since I was randomly crying.

The school called me 3 times to find out various information about Micah's diagnosis and about how to obtain his records from our cover school. I almost had a heart attack each time.

He rode the bus home yesterday and was thrilled.  He had a great day and was excited to have been able to go.

This morning he got up and got ready.

We missed the bus but dang it, he had 3 pencils and a backpack.

Why We Celebrate Christmas but Not Halloween

Why yes, he is picking his nose in our Christmas Photo

If you haven't read it already, we don't celebrate Halloween. We thought long and hard about it and came to the conclusion that our convictions do not allow it. When we have that conversation with people who do celebrate/participate in it we often hear "well then, how can you celebrate Christmas when it also has pagan roots?". I think it is a good question, sort of misguided, but I do think that we need to search scripture and pray any time we participate in an activity not specifically "OKed" in the Bible.

Both have roots in Paganism, it's true. Halloween finds its origins in All Hallows Eve, a Catholic holiday which was set aside to honor the dead. A tradition called "souling" in which the rich would exchange bread with the poor in return for prayers for the dead is believe to be the beginnings of "trick or treat". Since I do not agree with Catholic doctrine, I cannot celebrate Halloween as a Christian holiday and feel that I should actively avoid based on this reason alone. However, there is more. Halloween has evolved and as different cultures, occults and religions added to it, it has not only become a day to celebrate false theology, but also to celebrate, death, destruction and evil. Today there is nothing left of Halloween that is redeemable. The holiday as a whole, is a pure representation of evil. I don't have a problem with dressing up. I do have a problem with glorifying death and destruction, the very things which Christ gave himself to triumph over. Since the holiday as a whole does this, we cannot participate in good conscience.

Christmas on the other hand has a different history. Most of the traditions are hard to trace back to their roots, and I am sure that some of them are actually born out of pagan rituals. However, the original holiday, Saturnalia, a week in which Roman law was closed and citizens could basically behave how they wished without fear of being prosecuted by the courts, was a pagan holiday influenced by Christianity rather than the other way around. Over the years Christmas has taken a distinctly different path than Halloween in that it has become increasingly more Christian (though it is in a decline right now) and Halloween has become increasingly more evil. I have given some links below that get more detailed in specific traditions associated with Christmas and how Christians have turned them into traditions that represent Christ rather than pagan rituals.

Since the Bible does not mention either holiday we have to comb scripture a little more to find our answers on whether or not we can exercise our Christian freedoms with these two holidays. Scripture tells us in Philipians 4:9 Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. Can I find pure and lovely things in Halloween? No, I can't. Can I find pure and lovely things worthy of praise in Christmas? Yes, I can.

There are certain aspects of Christmas that we don't bother with. My older two don't believe in Santa any more and we have made no secret to my younger that Santa isn't real, though he still struggles with it since he is only 4 and can't quite sort it all out. Basically we don't lie about it. When they ask we tell. I don't think Santa is evil or wrong necessarily, but I do think perpetually lying to my children is.

Of course, I don't answer for what your family celebrates and I believe it to be very important for each of us to search scriptures and spend time in prayer contemplating what the Lord would want us to do in these situations. I hope this sheds a bit of light on why I am ok with Christmas but not ok with Halloween.


http://www.simpletoremember.com/vitals/Christmas_TheRealStory.htm
http://www.gotquestions.org/Christian-Christmas.html
http://www.gotquestions.org/Christians-celebrate-Halloween.html

Feel free to let me know your thoughts in the comment section. I do not censor unless it becomes vulgar or personal.

12 Days of Christmas Giveaway! Day 7

Day 7 of our give away is sponsored by Natasha Varnick - an independent Shaklee representative. Here is what she has to say about it!!

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To enter to win the whole lot of our fabulous give away items look to all the Rafflecopter entries below! Remember to check back daily for more ways to win AND to see what else is coming in this super awesome give away!

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